Although this topic does not belong to the cheerful topics we usually deal with, such as movies or festivals, Serbian funeral is a part of Serbian culture and Serbian customs.
Serbs are very warm-hearted and emotional people, so moments like these are given great importance.
Customs can vary from place to place, town to town, and even from family to family.
In this blog post, we will answer some most common questions about Serbian funerals and Serbian mourning traditions. If you find yourself in the situation of attending a Serbian funeral, we hope this post will help you prepare.
What is the Serbian tradition when someone dies?
You’ve probably heard the saying that bad news spreads fast, and that’s the case when someone dies. But it is considered that death is only a transition from this temporary earthly life to eternal life.
However, sadness, despair and disbelief are some feelings that cannot be avoided when the death of a loved one occurs.
In Serbia, when someone dies, the closest relatives and friends are immediately notified. Often one of those family members or friends undertakes the obligation to pass the information to further relatives and acquaintances.
One of the customs is to leave the door of the house open on that day and the following day, as people come to express their condolences and offer support to the closest family of the deceased.
These are very difficult times, so many feel the need to show that they are there for those who are grieving.
The friends undertake to serve coffee or drinks to the people who came to express their condolences. Many friends, family members, and often work colleagues try to support the family by providing financial assistance, as funerals can be quite expensive.
For family or friends, if the deceased does not have a close relative, there are still some difficult obligations ahead.
This includes choosing clothes for the deceased, choosing a casket, a cross on which the name and surname will be written, as well as the year of birth and year of death.
A candle is also brought, which the priest will light during the act of saying goodbye to the deceased.
That candle is extinguished after the act of burial and then brought back to the cemetery at certain time intervals.
According to the Serbian Orthodox tradition, the burial ceremony should ideally take place on the third day, but the church also allows funerals on the fourth or fifth day.
What does the organization of a Serbian funeral look like?
According to the law in Serbia, the funeral is carried out no earlier than 24 hours after the death has been confirmed.
The funeral is organized extremely quickly. In those moments, the attention is slightly diverted from the enormous sadness that those closest to them feel, and this involvement does not allow the person to completely fade away mentally.
The family goes to the church closest to the home of the deceased, where they arrange with a priest who will read a prayer for the repose of the soul during the funeral. Some priests have fixed pricing, while others leave it to the family’s discretion to decide how much they wish to pay. Then the date and time when the funeral will take place is determined.
After that, čitulja (death announcement) is written and published in the newspaper Politika. They are printed out and hung on the door of the home where the deceased lived, on the places where he liked to spend time, as well as on the wall, board or tree next to the cemetery where he will be buried. Anyone can write and publish a čitulja to express their condolences in the newspaper, not only family.
How long is a Serbian Orthodox funeral?
A Serbian funeral usually lasts about an hour. Half an hour before the funeral, the family comes to the chapel where the casket is kept.
It’s up to the family to choose to leave the casket closed or open, but it is usually closed.
Also, Orthodox Christians are not cremated, unless there are certain reasons such as death due to infectious diseases.
Anyone can approach, kiss the coffin and lay their flowers, thus saying goodbye to the deceased.
The family usually stands on one side of the casket while other people approach to offer their condolences. They use the phrase Moje saučešće (My condolences). After that, people leave the chapel and wait for the priest.
After that, the priest comes and then Opelo begins. Opelo is an Orthodox church ceremony followed by the priest singing and reading prayers for the repose of the soul of the deceased. The priest usually uses koljivo (boiled wheat grain), red wine, a candle and a mixture of water and oil during the ceremony.
Then the procession starts heading towards the burial place where the coffin will be placed.
What to wear to a Serbian funeral?
In Serbia, it is customary for the closest relatives to wear black as a way of expressing grief for the deceased.
Most of the people who come to the funeral are also dressed in black, but this is not a rule.
Certainly, regardless of the closeness of blood or friendship with the deceased, the clothes should be modest and of subdued colors.
The family usually wears black for at least 40 days. In more traditional communities, this period can extend up to six months or one year.
What is Daća?
A Daća is a lunch attended by family and friends after a Serbian funeral.
It is mostly organized in a restaurant or in the family’s house. The purpose of Daća is to comfort the family and talk about the deceased.
It originated because people used to come for the funeral from far away, so it was somewhat necessary to organize this type of gathering.
It is also important that music cannot be played during the daća and for at least 40 days after the Serbian funeral. In more traditional families, especially in the countryside, music may not be played for up to one year, and they may avoid attending any festivities or celebrations as a sign of respect for their deceased loved one.
When do people visit the grave of the deceased?
Generally, the family and closest friends go to the cemetery again the morning after the funeral. Next time they go seven days after the burial, and again 40 days after that.
On the 40th day, a priest held a memorial service for the deceased. After that time the human soul comes before the righteous judgment of God.
At each arrival, the candle is lit again, and when a year has passed since the death, it is left to burn.
Besides these periods, the family visit the grave on Zadušnice (they are held 4 times a year and always fall on a Saturday because Saturday is a day to remember all the martyrs and the deceased), on the birthday of the deceased and, of course, every time they feel the need to do so.
Conclusion
As you can see, in Serbia, great attention is paid to this act, because of its importance.
Although it is a very sad event for all those who knew the deceased, in Orthodox Christianity, leaving this world is considered a transition to eternal life and the heavenly kingdom where there is peace and tranquillity.
We hope this article has helped you prepare for this unfortunate event.
